What Are You Looking For In A Relationship?

What Are You Looking For In A Relationship
How to Answer “What Are You Looking For in a Relationship?”

  • Answer clearly, concisely, and honestly. Your response should reflect what is truly important to you.
  • Possible things to look for in a relationship include emotional maturity, mutual trust and respect, friendship, physical attraction, and clear communication.
  • Ask your date to share what they are looking for as well to determine if the two of you are compatible.
  1. 1 Figure out what’s important to you. What are the top 3 qualities that you look for in a partner? Maybe they’re loyalty, honesty, and a sense of humor. Or, they could be someone who has a similar lifestyle as you. Try to imagine your perfect partner, then come up with 3 to 4 words to describe them.
    • “I’d like to find someone I can laugh and have fun with.”
    • “I’m mainly looking for companionship and loyalty.”
  2. 2 Answer honestly and sincerely. Your date is looking for your honest answer to see if you two are compatible. Try to come up with qualities you really value in a partner, then tell your date about them. If you two don’t match up, it’s better to know now than figure it out later.
    • “I’m looking for someone with similar hobbies and interests.”
    • Need more time to answer? Try a flirty, jokey response like, “Good question. You first!”


  3. 3 Stick to short, concise answers. Your date is looking for an honest answer, but they probably don’t want a list of 20 things that you can’t live without. Instead of listing all your ideals in a partner, stick to the top 3 things that you absolutely can’t live without.
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  1. 1 Emotional maturity Finding a partner who is mature and can talk about their thoughts and feelings with you is very important. Different maturity levels can lead to a lot of frustration and confusion, so it’s a great quality to look for in a partner. Being mature gives a person the ability to be aware of and manage their own emotions rather than relying on others to do it for them.
    • Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who would give you the silent treatment every time they were mad? Or, maybe they would yell and scream if they got angry. These are the signs of an emotionally immature person—they’re feeling their emotions, but they’re not trying to work through or regulate them at all.
    • A mature person will talk to you when they’re upset and be willing to work through problems with you.
  2. 2 Mutual trust and honesty The foundation of all healthy relationships is built on trust. Without it, you and your partner won’t be able to confide in each other. Look for someone who doesn’t make you feel insecure or like they’re lying to you.
    • You can tell your partner is trustworthy if they tell the truth about little things. If you catch your partner lying about small things in the beginning, chances are, they’ll probably lie about bigger things down the line.
  3. 3 Independence Even when you’re in a relationship, you can still have your own friends and hobbies. Spending time with your partner is great, but not if it’s the only thing that you do. Look for a partner who not only wants to make time for you, but makes time for themselves, too.
    • Does your date have a lot of hobbies and friends of their own? Do they wait a couple of days before wanting to see you again? If so, that’s a good sign that they’re independent.
    • If your partner tries to stop you from seeing your friends or doing your hobbies, that’s controlling behavior and is a red flag.
  4. 4 Mutual respect Look for a partner who appreciates you for who you are. It’s totally fine if your partner doesn’t understand your hobbies completely or hates your favorite TV show, but they should always have respect for you (and vice versa).
    • Respect means that your partner will really listen to you instead of dismissing you. They’ll also be proud of your accomplishments and encourage you to follow your dreams, even if they don’t quite understand them.
  5. 5 Communication You and your partner should feel comfortable enough to, Relationships are going to have problems, and it’s important that you and your partner are able to talk through them calmly and clearly. Look for someone who is passionate about talking things through with you rather than shoving them under the rug.
    • Does your date bring up things that make them uncomfortable? Do they tell you when they’re in a bad mood? If so, those are signs that they’re a great communicator.
    • Another great quality in a partner is someone who fights fairly. That means no yelling, name-calling, or cursing, even when they’re mad.
  6. 6 Friendship Your partner should only be your partner, but your friend, too! Find someone who you can hang out with and have a great time with no matter what you’re doing. This solid foundation of friendship will keep your relationship strong as the years go by.
    • Take note of how often you and your date laugh together and just have fun. The more comfortable you feel around them, the better.
  7. 7 Physical attraction Find a partner who you’re attracted to physically, and make sure that you’re satisfied with your sex life. Physical attraction and sex looks different for everyone, so there’s no “right” answer—just make sure that you and your partner are both happy with the amount of sex and intimacy you’re having.
    • In new relationships, it may take some adjustment before you’re 100% satisfied with your sex life, and that’s okay! Give each other some time to figure out what works and what doesn’t.
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  1. Ask them what they’re looking for in a partner to see if you two are compatible. Since they asked you first, it’s totally fine to throw the question back at them. Once you’ve listed your ideal partner, ask them what they’re looking for in a relationship. Hopefully, your values will line up, and you’ll know whether or not you two are compatible.
    • There are lots of little things you might differ on, like how late you like to stay up or when you like to eat dinner, that aren’t big problems.
    • However, large issues, like whether or not you want to have kids, have the potential to stop a relationship before it starts.

Ask a Question Advertisement This article was co-authored by and by wikiHow staff writer,, Cherlyn Chong is a breakup recovery and dating coach. With 6 years of experience, she specializes in working with high-achieving professional women who want to get over their exes and find love again.

  • Co-authors: 3
  • Updated: October 25, 2022
  • Views: 92,160


Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 92,160 times. : How to Answer “What Are You Looking For in a Relationship?”

What are you looking for in a partner?

1. Kindness, loyalty, and understanding (not looks, status, and excitement). – When people are asked to list the most important qualities in a potential partner, kindness, physical, an exciting, and income/earning potential tend to top the list.1 But once you’re actually involved in a relationship, some of these traits become more important than others.

  • Research I described in detail in found that those whose partners meet their ideals in terms of warmth and loyalty are more satisfied with their relationships.
  • Having a partner who meets one’s ideals in terms of physical attractiveness, excitement, status, and wealth, on the other hand, is much less correlated with overall satisfaction.

This research also found that having a partner who fell short on attractiveness, status, and excitement did not affect satisfaction if that partner was also highly warm, kind, and loyal. In other words, those more “superficial’ traits were not important at all for those whose partners were kind, understanding, and loyal.

What do you want in a relationship?

10 Things Your Relationship Needs to Thrive What Are You Looking For In A Relationship Source: Ivanko80/Shutterstock A relationship cannot survive on its own. It needs the care and nurturing of two adults, giving to each other in a way that creates a mutually beneficial connection. To foster a deep and loving relationship, there needs to be: 1.

  1. Ind, constant, and honest communication.
  2. Without talking, your relationship will not survive.
  3. The more you communicate, the closer you will be.2.
  4. The willingness to work through difficulties and disagreements.
  5. Throwing in the towel, even if you don’t walk out the door, is not the path to,
  6. You must face the discomfort that comes with differing opinions and ideas.3.

A, some fun, and a bit of distraction from the rigors of daily life. Just as we need to breathe to survive, your love needs a breath of fresh air to flourish. Giving your relationship what it needs to thrive is a truly loving gesture. You can’t spend all your free time “working” on your relationship—don’t make it a hobby.

  • Discuss what you like to do, where you’d like to go, and how you both like to have fun.
  • Then go do it.4.
  • Sharing life lessons with the one you love.
  • When you discover something about life, or you make a self-correcting move that is healthy for your relationship, let your partner know.
  • You’ll be surprised by the positive response.5.

Emotional support, validation, and compliments. If you don’t feel that your partner likes and respects you, there will not be a strong connection. You have to lift each other up and let each other know the depth of your caring.6. Love,, romance, and, These are the cornerstones of a loving relationship.

Being great roommates just won’t cut it. There has to be the desire to be together as a couple. You may think the spark has gone, but there are too many ways to rekindle it. All you have to do is try.7. Sharing and that resonate with both of you. We are happier when we are working toward a goal than when we have achieved one.

Make sure you always have something to look forward to and that you are pursuing it as a couple.8. Compassion, acceptance, and, These will show you the way through a difficult time. If you are together for a while, there will be losses, challenges, and some things that you just can’t fix.

Weathering the storms together is a big part of what relationships are all about.9. A mutual desire to step outside the box. The tried-and-true is good, but the never-attempted-before may be better. Couples who share new experiences together develop a stronger bond.10. Being able to admit mistakes and to talk about them.

We all screw up. Learning to understand and let go of mistakes that you or your partner make will turn your life around and give you more time for joy. Just as you need to breathe to survive, your love needs a breath of fresh air to flourish. Giving your relationship what it needs to thrive is a truly loving gesture. What Are You Looking For In A Relationship : 10 Things Your Relationship Needs to Thrive

What’s the 3 most important things in a relationship?

Having healthy relationships comes easy to some people. For the rest of us, they’re about as easy a drooling third-grader trying to pass an astrophysics exam. Not only have we set ourselves up to fail, we lack the perspective to even know where to begin in creating healthy, loving relationships in our lives.

Mutual respectMutual trustMutual affection

We’ll cover each component in more detail throughout this article, but briefly, here’s what they look like in a healthy relationship: Respect in the relationship means that you both hold each other in high regard. When you respect someone, you admire them for certain qualities they possess and/or the character they embody.

  1. Trust in each other means you take each other at your word.
  2. If one person says they’re going to do something, the other person assumes they’ll do as they say.
  3. If someone makes a mistake, the other person expects them to be honest and tell them.
  4. In fact, trust really just comes down to each person being completely honest with the other, even when it’s uncomfortable.

Affection in healthy relationships is freely given and received. Healthy couples don’t need to remind themselves to show their partner that they love and appreciate them. They just do, And the recipient receives affection with affection rather than turning it away or taking it for granted.

What are 4 things for a good relationship?

It’s hard to define what a healthy relationship looks like because we all navigate relationships differently. – Relationships are generally seen through the lenses of our gender as well as our sexuality, but there are many other aspects of our identity that are going to inform what we see as good or bad, desirable or detestable, healthy or unhealthy.

It’s not as simple as “don’t be a jerk” (although that’s a great starting point). Because of that complexity, it might be easy to throw in the towel and say “there’s no such thing as a universally healthy relationship.” I won’t disagree with that (we’ll discuss it later), but I will suggest that there are four elements that are required for a healthy relationship.

That is, they’re not sufficient (these things alone won’t do it), but they are necessary. What’s more, I would argue that these same four things can lead to a relationship that is fundamentally unhealthy, as much as they can build up a healthy one. Unlike being a jerk, which is more of a one-dimensionally bad way to be.

When building relationships, the materials we use are important, and the ways we use those materials are just as important. Without further ado, here are four things that are needed for a healthy relationship: respect, equality, safety, and trust, Each of these components can manifest in healthy ways or in unhealthy ways in any relationship, and are built with actions as much as words.

Following is the explanation behind a healthy relationship model that I co-created with Karen Rayne of Unhushed,

What are the goals of relationship?

It’s About Intimacy, Effective Communication, Friendship, Respect, and Understanding – Being in a relationship is a two-way street. Both people need to be willing to put in the work for the relationship to be successful. Relationship goals can help you determine if the relationship is healthy, where you might want to improve your relationship, and if it’s time to get out of a bad relationship,

Remember that some days will be better than others, but by creating relationship goals and setting healthy relationship boundaries, you will undoubtedly be setting yourselves up for more good days than bad ahead. Talkspace articles are written by experienced mental health-wellness contributors ; they are grounded in scientific research and evidence-based practices.

Articles are extensively reviewed by our team of clinical experts (therapists and psychiatrists of various specialties) to ensure content is accurate and on par with current industry standards. Our goal at Talkspace is to provide the most up-to-date, valuable, and objective information on mental health-related topics in order to help readers make informed decisions.

What are 8 of the most important things in a relationship?

Infographic: 6 Essentials For A Successful Relationship – Our relationships are one of the most challenging and gratifying aspects of our lives. Love is a fantastic experience. But unlike what many people think, love is not everything. Love alone won’t keep a couple together since relationships require much more than love to sustain them. What Are You Looking For In A Relationship Illustration: StyleCraze Design Team What Are You Looking For In A Relationship It may surprise many, but love is not the only requirement for a happy and fulfilling relationship; it is made of many smaller yet vital components. Open communication, loyalty, kindness, compassion, trust, emotional vulnerability, and willingness to forgive are some of the most important things that keep a relationship afloat.

What are 6 aspects of relationship?

What are the characteristics of a healthy relationship? – Healthy relationships are defined by a number of necessary components. Our experts identified six key characteristics of a healthy relationship, including empathy, trust, respect, compromise, laughter, and communication.

Chief among them is communication, says Stephanie Newman, PhD, a psychoanalyst and psychologist in New York. “Partners should make a point of agreeing to resolve disputes. The process of airing out grievances and addressing concerns should be regular and ongoing,” she says, adding that listening closely and compromise are both essential.

(Here are some communication tips you can try in your relationship.) But before you can really understand what makes a healthy relationship, it’s important to recognize the traits of an unhealthy one.

What do you value most in a relationship?

Trust : Every good relationship needs a foundation of trust. Relationship experts claim that trust is the most important value of every successful relationship. Without trust, romantic relationships quickly deteriorate.

What are the 3 Big C’s of relationships?

Relationships that are 50/50 are flatlined. Relationship dynamics will go up and down based on communication, compromise and commitment, the 3C’s. Spring 2019 Speaker Elder Little Brown Bear discusses how to use the 3C’s to build healthy relationships within romantic relationships and non-romantic relationships alike.

These can also be used in business and with clients. 3C’s for healthy relationships – YouTube Leading Edge Seminars 1.3K subscribers 3C’s for healthy relationships Leading Edge Seminars Watch later Share Copy link Info Shopping Tap to unmute If playback doesn’t begin shortly, try restarting your device.

More videos

How do you answer what are you looking for in dating?

Just be honest and direct : a date, a partner, a friend, some casual fun. If you worry about your words, just simply put it in your bio, then people won’t ask.

What are the 3 main qualities of love?

The triangular theory of love explains the topic of love in an interpersonal relationship. Psychologist Robert Sternberg’s theory describes types of love based on three different scales: intimacy, passion, and commitment.